watered down forgiveness + justified retentance

Hello! :)
its been a while since i used my blog! but i am back now! ready to write away life and life expereinces once again! i was reminded of my blog after a friend told me me i have a gift of writting! that i will do great if i pursue a career in such an area!
So i have decided to start 2010 with a good one!
Happy new year by the way, i trust you have God in your year, with him joy and peace and freedom is all for you this year!

Its been brought to my attention within this christian culture of ours, something so powerful to break bondages and heal hurts! something so freeing and releases reconciliation has become distorted, watered down and misused!
I am talking about forgiveness and repentance!
my expereince only recently this year has seriously alarmed me and i really feel the need to comment on it as i beleive it happens alot!

Forgiveness and how its displayed sometimes it out right dissapointing and quite frank i believe God greives over how we sometimes handle forgiveness!
spending alot of time in a christian residential program and again for a short time in another one i have learnt and been pounded with the importance of forgiveness and repentace! both places has taught the right and healthy process of it!
however in a world were naturally we like to justify ourself in why we do things and really do not like to take responsibility!
i know this too well because i myself used to have this type of approach in life! only over the years! i have really understood and live what forgiveness should be and is!

does this sound too familiar to you? when you go to someone and say i am sorry then the words... BUT!!!! or HOWEVER!!! ????? or has it been done to you?!! it has to me! and i hate it! to make it a little clearer... " i am sorry for saying those nasty things i done to you, BUT you made me so mad and so angry"!
That my friend is a clear as crystal example of what forgiveness is not! i believe what we do in any situation is what we need to own! meaning if i blow off at someone i am responsable for what i say and do! not the person u lost it with! So taking responsability for our action and not saying "you made me do this" " you made me angry" and so on!
if you are really sorry and become so humble you own what u did and thats it! full stop! you should never justify your actions! because when doing so you are saying i am sorry but not really because u made me feel like this so u are responsable for how i reacted!

now repentance!
it carrys a similar approach in not justifying! but when someone repents to you its outrageous to have a puffed chest saying "So you should be"!!! remember its most likely the hardest thing to come and admit to someone a wrong you have done and then get thrown in your face again what u did!
maybe you will like this approach i take!
when someone repents to me i don't like to say "ah its all good" cause really its not ok what they did but i say "thanks so much for apologising" hug them and have all round a heart of love and respect for that person who just humbled themselves completely!!!
never do i say or give an attitude of " yeah you better be sorry" "do u know how much that hurt oh man u blew it" that is quite degrading to a person who knows what they did or otherwise wouldn't be humbly coming before us!

watered down forgiveness and jusified repentance needs to stop in this culture!
Does God say "oh sarah you do know when you did that it was really bad and you made me feel so horrible and i really just can't talk to you right now cause its just insane what you did so just give me space and don't talk to me cause you really blew it and it made me feel......................"
HAHA!! i laugh because if God did that! we all would be feeling condemed won't we??!!! YES!! yes we will indeed!
but His style of forgiveness is amazingly freeing! its not even a style but a life style He asks us to follow "be imitators of christ" it says in the bible!!
there is no condemnation in christ so why the heck are we going around condeming people when they want forgiveness and are repentant?~?~?~

So there is some food for thought! i really hope this christian culture today will no longer water down something that is meant to work in all its power! because when something is watered down its effect isn't as strong as it should be! Its work itsn't as effective as it wants to be!!!!

Love you all!!!!

important news! please pray!

Hi there!
i don't know how to start this blog post! but something really big has happened! i have had all my belongings stolen! including my passport airfares credit cards money and personal travel documents! my friend and I went to a mountain and parked the car i had all my stuff in one bag since we moved house! on a short walk in the mountains her car was smashed into through the window and my bag was taken!
the last 2 nights have been extremely emotional and stressful and overwhelming for me! after this happened we went to my friends house and canceled my cards but in a space of an hour reaching phone reception those people who stole my stuff started using my bank card! so i canceled the rest of the card amount and other cards i had!
i have had no money only a little US dollars and contacting home and banks and airlines and travel agents was and has been a huge hassle! Brianna's parents have helped out alot! today i was reissued with another passport from the aussie embassy! however another melt down came crashing down!
i am unable to use my return ticket as i am not allowed to enter the USA! which i had planned a week holiday there! because the pass port is only an emergancy passport it doesn't reach USA customs standard and so they don't allow people to enter on these passports!!
so i just got even more emotional and just want to go home! so i have decided to leave Canada in a few days time! returning home!! the main problm has been is cash! i had to buy a new ticket home! which was alot of money and it became a stress transfering the money i had left on my cards back in Aussie into my travel agent account so they can book a flight for me to get out of the country!
Can i ask for you prayers and thoughts as i come to terms with people i don't know knowing everything bout me on the side of identity! i have cancelled everything! it still doesn't make me feel anybetter!
i can not believe this has been a part of my trip and has to end my trip the way its made it end!! i am sad and fearful, angry and pissed off! BUSTARDS!
please pray for me!!!

HISTERICAL!!!!!

HI there only a quick little blog to say that tonight after pizza we got into a conversation about slurpee's and brianna's husband told me all the awesome flavours you can get here! and for us aussies now we need o start stepping up in the world when it comes to sluppee 7 eleven flavours! and sizes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So tonight went ona random drive o check out a north american/canadian slurpee!!! and you won't believe what i see!!! there is't an apple or orange at sight no water or healthyness! just candy and slurppee!
i need you to be sitting done when u read this next bit!!
but i bought a 1.8 litre cup full of all the flavours that were there!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA i prmised my friends i would only eat half and then for them to take it off me once i have had half!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA
1.8 litres!!! well i had these flavours.... white creamy soda, cola, punch red, orange blast and bubble gum blue!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WHOOPWHOOP!!!!
well i got an extre cup to bring home just to prove to got it, but it won't mean i drank it al!!!

bits and peices!!!

HELLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So i have the afternoon at home and Brianna my friend joking made a comment about blogging about a few things i have encountered! that have not been all roses! but its not depressing or sad just the joys of touring countries i guess!!!
Well You know how in my last blog i told you about my experience of trying a Canadian apple tradition?? well as u can see these pictures i found on the Internet of what i have just found sooooooooooooo yummy!! So a little secret and you are not allowed to take my idea away but my friend here and i were talking and when i get home i am going ot learn how to make these apples and make a mini business out of them!!! We have nothing like these only toffee apples in Aussie so i am gonna make all the sweet tooths well pleased! and start experimenting with ways of making these kinda apples and sell at markets to begin with!!! then i can see shops opening up!!! vision is always good!! but for now i will get it going as soon as i get back so christams on the central coast can be filled with choc and caramel copped apple goodies!!!
My friend brianna will corraspond with me and help me out with ingredients whether be finding them in Australia or sending stuff over!!! But how exciting is that??!! So i am heaps excited about that! i got a name ready for it.... appleteers!!! like apples and pioneering something new! so put that together and now its appleteers!! HAHAHAHA!!! are you all laughing??? Brianna said it sounds sad!! lol true wih the teer part!! oh well i will put some serious thought into it! but now just to get back to my holiday!!!
So yesterday i told you i went to the city and did some shopping! welllllllllllllllllllll i didn't inform you on something that i found totally histerical!! kinda got on my nerves a bit too as well as brianna's!! So this is it... We went in to a shop called ZARA here its kinda equivalent to a "general panta Co" in Aussie, really lovely store here actually clothes we don't have in some ways! but anywhoooooo, so its 2 story! bottom is all womens and up top is womens and kids right?? right!! lol, so went up stairs and found heaps cool jeans i tried on cause i still figuring out my USA size! well went into a change room upstairs when i was in there this young lady who works there came screaming (SERIOUSLY) outside my change room saying "this is not for women to use its only kids change room so go change down stairs"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! like in such attitude!!!!
Brianna was like "she's just trying one pair of jeans on she won't be long" and this lady snapped at her "well she shouldn't be in there"!!!!!! So i walked out in shock and my friend was like that is soooooo bad service! we looked to see if there was a sign that says what change room it is for! and nothing!!!! no sign!
I was gonna go to the young little brat!!! HAHAHA and tell her there is no sign up to say only kids change rooms so if u want it for kids only, a sign on the wall might just help a little for customers!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! if u know me well can u imagine how i'd say that!!!??? Buuuuuuutttttt i decided to let it go, walked out and it still bugged me so i and my friend were thinking of ways to fix it!! this is my idea! beware its kinda harsh but i was devo at the time! So i would get the girl to come find the manager and follow her then once the manager was found i'd dob her in right then and there while she was there!!! HAHAHA so not nice right?!
So it probably sounds not a big deal but if u only knew how rude this little brat sounded, oh my!!! buuuutttt fortunately we didn't act on it and i decided to make my own "kids change room only" sign and sent it to her!!! HAHAHAHA
KIDDING!!!
i guess i am a big fan on posstive friendly service because i have worked in customer service a fair bit and its important to honour and respect customers, and people either way you see it work or not work right?? right!!! well that little brat blew my hair back for all the wrong reasons HAHAHA...
ok so something that doesn't involve little bad service brats!!
Well i bought a canadian mug/cup for a gift!! i made the people wrap it up cause flying on planes and the bag handlers are not so sweet and tneder with your luggage right!! so they wrapped it up with news paper! well its what we thought was news paper till.... i was on the sky train coming home with brianna when i bumped hard my bag and the mug was in the bag! we both heard something break!!! so we looked at my awesome mug now totally ruined by me and it hasn't even reach the airport people yet!! HAHAHA! so both sitting down unwrapping the paper it was not new paper but asian "exscort" services adds paper!!! GROOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!
So we both said how could u ever possibly ever want to use something like that used for customers at a tourist shop!!!! sick aye!!!
Well after all that i found it hard to let go of this mug that broke! it was the best one out of 2 i bought!! and well i was in denial about it being too far gone to possibly fix! so i thought of ways to fix it but it was sharp, it kept cutting my fingers while i was trying to put the broken things together!! So then this morning i decided to let go of this mug i just looooove!!! in hope something better will come along!!!
HAHAHAHA i just read that out to my friend and she was like "DRAMATIC"!!!!!!! haha drama is the story of my life!!! HEHEHEHEHE.

ok before i leave this already long blog i went out last nigh with Brianna and her husband and i tried also another north america awesome thing! its called a cinnimon bun!!! but super size me size! I ATE IT ALL!!!!!!!!! it was so FREAKING YUMMMMM!!!!! so apparently they have them in the USA everywhere so when i go down there i am totally gonna buy a box full and bring them home!! and EAT THEM ALL!!!!
but guys if i was you just save ur pennies and come to america just for these cinnimon buns!!! AWEESSOOOOOOOME!!!! i have notice north americans do eat alot! what they eat alot of is greesy junk!!! but i have to say its now important to have a cinninmon bun as part as your daily intake!!! it will blow ur hair RIGHT BACK!!!
ok so today!!! its really layed back we are moving house, well my friend is moving house so we have packed allllllllll morning!! and just having great time together!!!
tonight we get to have north american pizza!!!!! look out!!!

A day in Vancouver city

Today i embarked on the most coolest adventure! Vancouver city is sooooo beautiful and as much as it reminded me of Sydney city a little it also was completely different with the shops and the scenery! Its like impossible to escape from massive awesome mountains! the main street called "Robson" street its full of awesome shopping and restaurants, but something amazing which i did take a photo of was looking down he street you have either side of the street and right at the end these 2 massive mountians!!! with pine trees covering them! its like half city half forfest seen right in the middle of the city!!
So it was an amazing thing to see! i went souvenier shopping and bought a cool shirt that says i (heart) Canada. Its awesome! we had lunch and for the first time i expereinced the north american tipping system!!!! HAHA so its 10 to 15 percent tipping charge on top of the total on your bill!!! hey did u know its not actually a law in canada to tip!!!!! So i would love to go against the tipping system just to stir up a few feathers!!! HAHA nooooo i am kidding! they get paid shit money for the work they do in the waitressing job area! so i am actually blessed that i can bless others that give great service!!!
ummmm what else to share, hhhhmmmm oh my friend is actually moving house over the weekend ahead! so i am helping them move and get the honour to stay in their new house first before anyone else! so i also get to see another part of Vancouver! OH MY!! i have to tell you this ok!!!!!!..... WEll in Australia we have toffee apples right?? right!! well guess what they have here?????? i tried some but gonna by a full one, its apple like a peel whole apple dipped in chocolate with flavours made on it like theres newyork cheese cake, oreo, caramel toppings and just heaps of others!!! its amazing guys! seriously amazing! and you know what! i'll go back there and make sure i take photo's to show u all, but they are yummy!!! healthy too if u don't think whats on the outside of the apple! and just think about the apple! hehehe, you know i would take them home but its fruit! u can't get that past customs!!!
also when i come back we are going to have pancakes with canadian maple syrup!! FREAKING AWESOME!!! they have sweet maple spread too, u put on toast! its a sweet spread like jam but not jam!! ummm they also have really fancy cakes and pastries! Oh MY i am enjoying my time here!!! its just the best! its such a blessing and a load of fun to be over here in Canada, and i have not even expereinced the second part of my holiday within the USA!
Well not to indulge in alot of this, but i have had the chance to view my life and more so life back in Australia! how much i limit life and limit the expereinces i can have, and how life can be full of conditions and complications, especailly being a christian!! but i have been really impressed to make changes!! one of the is not so practical but more so within myself to make my life simple in my faith but significant! i don't know yet how this will happen but i know it needs to happen! So YAY for the new me ahead! i believe this will involve me reading the bible and finding out who the real Jesus is in all his beautifulness and in all his glory and not with people's veiw! for a personal and real knowledge thats not guided by man!and i guess u will only get that by reading the book that is all about Him! right?? right!! A RELATIONSHIP BASED ON PERSONAL CONVICTION IS A LIFE BETTER THEN LIFE BEING BASED ON ANOTHERS CONVICTION!!!! wow i just got that little quote then! i just blew my own hair back!! HAHA.... NO ONE STEEL IT!!! i will slap you!!!
well i guess life on holiday can do you some goodness right!!!
So tonight we have having mexican food!!! yummy i think!! well keep looking at my blog ok!

SFU!!!!

Hello friends!!! So i never imagined i'd ever sit in famous university in north America!! its not harvard or yale but its SFU!! (simon fraser university) you're probably wondering what on earth am i doing at a Univeristy!!! HAHAHA i ask myself the same thing! but my friend comes here! she has a class this afternoon so i tagged along!! its on top of a mountain right!! so one side of the university over looks Vancouver city and the other overlooks mountains and forest and glacier mountains (snowy mountains) OMG!!! Its just beautiful!! so i have 3 hours to pretend i am a university student at a great university and explore this massive place!!! U can see it the photo above its HUUUUUGE!!! the libaray has MAC's!!!!!! like thats just awesome!!!! and heaps of coffee shops and other shops! i am tempted on getting a SFU jumper!!! apparently its the biggest UNI in Canada along with another one!!
So thought i'd share that cause this is a good part of my trip i'd love to remember!!!!!! get to see where my mate goes to school at! She is studying in education! so a teacher!!
The winter olympics are also being held in Vancouver in February next year apparently the vancouver people are dissapointed because its 400 dollars for 1 ticket to see one event!!!! CRAZY HEY!!!!

MY first 2 days in CANADA!!

Heyya!!!! so welcome to Canada! i have been here for 2 days now! unfortunately i didn't take my lap top so i have limited use to the computer since i'm always on adventures and don't always have assess to the net!! But every few days i will def add to my blog...
So i finally made it to Canada with some little complications on the way! i flyed on the new plane, the A380 air! ummmm it was a little let down since everyone has been raving about it!! its still the same plane with hardly no leg space but it is huge cause its double decker!!
But we were on the plane waiting 3 hours before we flew headed for the USA!!! there was an engineering problem so we waited and waited all up for 3 hours! the flight finally took of and then it was all exciting!!!! L.A here i come!!! the flight to L.A was loooooong and quite boring at some stages cause all the movies i liked i watched in the first 8 hours! and it was a 16 hour trip HAHAHA!!! but a little fun thing, cause i have always wanted to be a a air hostess! it was fun seeing how they do there job and thinking how cool it would be to work with an airline!! i love the uniform QANTAS flight attendants wear!! i was always interested to know what shoes i'd need for a job like that! and now i know!!!!
So i finally reached L.A!!!! WOW!!! i have landed on U.S.A soil!!! my dream has come true!!! so i missed my connection flight to CANADA because of the delay outts sydney! so i waiting in L.A airport for around 6 hours!!! its a long time to sit when u have been sitting for 16 hours so i was gonna take a bus out to L.A city but with not knowing where to actually go i thought it would be better just to hang around the airport!! but i will get to expereince L.A when i return there after canada!
So the L.A airport is crazy!! its mostly all under construction/renovation!!!! so its crazyness there!! but i did manage to find a maccas and try a cheese burger meal!! GROOOOOOSSSSSSS!!
we have much better cows and cooks in aussie BELIEVE ME!!!! then i just looked at all the shops that were open amoung the renovations been done! Then it was time to go through the departure lounge to fly off to Canada!!! that 6 hours went quickly actually!!!
i was also trying to let my friend know in canada that i won't be on the flight that the details i gave her said! so it was quite stresful trying to call her from the USA!! to let her know i am gonna be late! finally just before i boarded the plane to canada i worked out the national code for canada to text my friend so i was relieved then!!!
from L.A to canada is only a 2 and half hour flight!!! it was relaxing and lovely service!!! with ALASKA airways!!!
i got to my friends house around 10 at night!!! and was completely tired!!! but my friends brother that i also know was there to greet me!!! it was so lovely to see my friends again after soooooo many years!! so we had kiwi lime pie!!! it was nice very north american i think!! but it was lovely kinda tasted like cheese cake! then i went to bed!!
NOW!!!!
day one!!! i woke up and felt really tired but thought i would wake up and just press through it to get used to the time here!!! So in the morning we went to the store i just had to see called "WALL MART" yay!!!! it was amazingly just like big w!!!! lol.... but i have a photo of me standing outside i!!! then i learnt about something so cool!! Briannas mum and sister came over and took me on a Vancouver tour to the mountains!!!! SOOOOO BEAUTIFUL!!! while brianna had to work, we went to a place called the Dykes it sounds like bikes with a d!!! its a trail that leads u around mountains and lakes!!! SO awesome it really blew my hair back and just amazed me with all the mountains and wildlife!!!!
Then had dinner with my friend geordy!!! He is lovely and i was in south afica with him, he was actually in my outreach team! so had a good catch up/dinner with him and his/briannas family!! i told them that drop bears in aussie a real and we do eat guinni pig!!!!!! HAHAHA they believed me!!!!! then at night i went on a awesome drive through Vancouver city centre!!!!! its a real lovely city! oneday we are gonna hang out for the day there but last night drove through many diverse parts of the city, like the gay community street! the heaps expensive shopping strip!! called robson street! to the dangerous area when we locked our doors! that sure made me feel real good HAHAHA!!!!
then lastly this is awesome!!!! we went to a look out over the city! and guess what i saw?????
RACOONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so close and and so cute! now that really made me see i was overseas in CANADA!!! i had my camera but it died so we are gonna go back there when my camera was charged to take photos of the little racoons!!! they were walking past me into the bush and i wanted them to come out so started throwing little pepple rocks into the bush!!! my friends were laughing crazy warning me they might come out and bite me!!!
so i stopped!!!
HAHAHAHAHA!!!
well that was my first whole day in CANADA!!! there is still heaps to come!! huge 5 story malls bear finding and more adventures!! so stay tuned!!!
i am doing well in myself! just enjoying hte time away! and my lovely friends! i love how after 5 years we just picked up were we left off and i just really enjoy the memories we have of YWAM and south africa and the cups of tea with updates of what has happened over the years!!!!
i am still jet lagged but hopefully in the next few days i will settle in canadaian time! its good cause L.A has the same time so when i am there it won't bother me!!!!
well thata it out and over from me and my blog writting!!!
keep cool!!!